Top Quality French Carp Fishing
NEW Lake Record caught on 26th. April 2017 at 76lb 15oz
and 14 different 60lb plus carp And 2 known 70lb plus carp.
Hover over image for larger picture
Chapter Eight -
Somehow we became the proud owners of an alarm clock which had a recording of an Imam calling the faithful to prayer as its alarm sound.
This was too good an opportunity to miss and just had to be set up to destroy someone’s sleep.
A suitably unsuspecting victim was chosen and the clock was secretly placed between the bivvy skins and set for 3.00 am.
Most of the rest of the anglers were aware and prepared to see what would happen. At three sharp the booming voice of the Imam could be heard wailing across the lake.
A sharp “what the ……..” came from the victims bivvy and then he rushed out and ran round the back and into the hedge.
With laughter stifled we watched as he returned and beat the fabric until the noise stopped and then gradually returned to bed.
I went round the following morning and he was still laughing about it. I pointed out that his head torch was still switched on and he explained that he had been frightened to turn it off because he was certain that something else would happen before dawn.
I then asked him why he had run round the back of the bivvy only to hear him explain that, in his half asleep state, he was convinced that a van load of Iranians had pulled up behind him. Another classic.
BEWARE OF WILD ANIMALS
I have saved the best for last and this will probably remain the classic Moorlands moment of all time.
A group of anglers had spent the week with us and, on Friday evening, as the sun set, they were stood on the Boneyard swim discussing the week. The angler in the next swim, about fifty yards away, was “Scouse” and he, unknowingly, was the targetfor this week’s wheeze.
The next swim further round from Scouse was where the trip organizer, Kevin, had set up and it was Kevin who suggested that he should go and make sure that he had locked the van before it got too dark.
Nobody questioned his remark and off he went into the gloom. What nobody knew was that Kev' had smuggled a full fancy dress bear costume into his bivvy.
Once fully dressed in the bear suit he crept back round to Scouse’s swim and knelt down between bivvy and rods. It now being dark meant that he couldn’t be seen by any of the gathered anglers in the next swim but a gentle tweak of one of the rods sent a signal to Scouse’s remote.
“Blimey, the number one rod” said Scouse as he headed back to check his rods.
As soon as he was within ten or so paces of his swim he was suddenly aware of a huge head with big ears and glowing red eyes peering at him around his bivvy.
He froze and as Kev' saw him stop he lurched forward with a deep throaty growl. Scouse’s scream alerted us all to his fear and as he sped back along the path and past us he was screaming “It’s a f….ing bear” over and over.
By now Kev' was crawling along the path and a barrage of headlights lit up his costume and then mass hysteria set in and nobody could speak for several minutes.
Hearing our howls of laughter, Scouse made his way back to the group and was mercilessly ripped to shreds. When someone asked why he hadn’t worked out that it was a joke his answer, in a strong Liverpool accent, of “It had big ears and everything and I could hear its hooves on the gravel” just turned all of us back into gibbering wrecks.
As if to sign off on a high Scouse was last out of the shower the following morning and as he walked down to get in the van to leave he was met by a large group of carp anglers singing “If you go down in the woods today you’re sure of a big surprise ……………..” Pure class.
Well that just about brings us right up to date and I hope that you have enjoyed reading about our early years as fishery owners half as much as I have enjoyed being part of it. I also hope that the fun continues over the next few years. Be lucky . . . . .Keith Moors